The more I think about the assertion that “love is not an emotion, it is a choice and commitment” it reflects a perspective that argues true love is a consistent, active decision to nurture a relationship and be present for another person or group (be they human, animal, or other living “thing”) rather than just a spontaneous feeling that can fade. This emphasizes that love is sustained by a daily choice to stay, work through challenges, and dedicate oneself to the relationship, forming a deeper connection that endures beyond fluctuating feelings and emotions.
Why Love is More Than an Emotion
- Emotions are fleeting, whereas commitment is enduring: While emotions can be intense, they are also temporary and can change. Love, viewed as a choice and commitment, is a consistent force that can keep a relationship strong even when feelings are low.
- Focus on actions over feelings: This perspective suggests that love is expressed through actions and consistent choices to support and care for another, rather than relying on romantic feelings.
- Nurturing a connection: Love requires active participation and a conscious decision to nurture the relationship, work through difficult times, and sustain the connection with another.
The Role of Choice and Commitment
- Daily decision to love: Choosing to love means deciding every day to remain in the relationship and to continue loving the person or people, even when things are challenging.
- Foundation for lasting relationships: This commitment is what forms the basis of a lasting and meaningful connection, especially in long-term relationships where the initial intensity of feelings may naturally evolve.
- Transforming relationships: Embracing love as a conscious choice can transform relationships, allowing for a deeper and more meaningful connection to develop.
This a work in progress and my thinking about “love”, so if you return here, these notes may change, like everything else in my aging, growing, evolving, and developing life. James